Procrastination always has two elements: the task you’re putting off and the internal forces that are causing you to do so. The more you deal with your inner “demons,” the easier it will be to take action. First on the list of these inner demons is self-esteem. Feelings of guilt and worthlessness fuel procrastination.
When you start to get things done, you experience these feelings less and less.
In our projects as in life, we come up against obstacles. We need to handle those obstacles in order to see the task through to the end. Self-esteem helps us to do that because it helps us develop resilience and the belief that we can succeed despite barriers. Self-esteem can grow or it can diminish, and we can control that.
So, what is self-esteem? The most important component of self-esteem is internal. It’s the ability to like and accept yourself with all your strengths and weaknesses, and in spite of the mistakes you make. It’s understanding that you are equal to anyone else and you, like anyone else, are unique and one-of-a-kind. It’s not ego driven. It’s not a belief that you’re superior to anyone. It’s the understanding that each one of us is unique, special, and important.
Another component of self-esteem comes from the reflection of ourselves that we get from other people. We get either positive or negative feedback from people in obvious or subtle ways all the time. We get from the media, from work, and from our relationships. Unfortunately, we can’t always depend on outside sources to have our best interests at heart or even to be honest. So, although it’s inevitable that some of our self-concept comes from outside sources, a much better, more fulfilling approach to our lives is to develop our internal self-esteem and diminish the effects of external self-esteem.
Our job, then, is to build a solid foundation of internal self-esteem. The key to doing this is to be aware of what’s going on in your thoughts and your emotions and then taking action based on that awareness. Here are the questions to ask yourself:
The answers to these questions should give you an awareness of yourself that will strengthen your internal self-esteem and lessen your need for approval of others.
Next, here are some powerful actions that you can take to strengthen your self-esteem and diminish your tendency to procrastinate:
Here’s one non-negotiable law for living the life you dream of: self-esteem is essential to our well-being. It’s not selfishness; it’s just the opposite.